what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize