he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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