I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
We need a shit load of segways right now
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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