Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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