Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize