glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
