A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Who did Billy Mays play for?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
