can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Randomize