i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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