I'm laying in your front yard are you home
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Randomize