I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
