Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
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