just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
