I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
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he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
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This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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