Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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