dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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