It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
