How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
