she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize