Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
My pussy is not your playground.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Randomize
