I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize