Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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