Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
