My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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