Your dad touched me again.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
