I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Randomize
