She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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