Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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