All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
