I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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