Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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