Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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