I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
