did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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