What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
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