Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
