i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize
