are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
