I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
