I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
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