So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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