oh god the rape fog is back!
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
