McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
