I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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