i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
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