drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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