Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Even my vagina gasped.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
