apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Randomize
