ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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