The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
pray to the hookup gods
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